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83. Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.
84. I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
85. Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
86. Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
87. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
88. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
89. I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
90. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
91. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
92. Smoking cures weight problems, eventually.
93. A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
94. The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
95. I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
96. I ran three miles today. Finally I said, “Lady take your purse.”
97. I said “no” to drugs, but they just wouldn’t listen.
98. I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.
99. I was reading the dictionary, I thought it was a poem about everything.
100. I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn’t have to go so fast.