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11. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
12. War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
13. If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.
14. The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
15. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
16. Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
17. If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…
18. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
19. Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
20. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..